Monday, July 19, 2010

If Chewbacca is a Wookie, you must support ending the mandatory long form census

A source in Ottawa not pleased with the Conservative government's position on the scrapping of the mandatory long form census (I understand it's causing some dissension in the party ranks) has leaked me the latest set of talking points that PMO spokesperson Dmitri Soudas is expected to begin using in support of the government's position in the coming days. I fear they may prove frightfully persuasive.


***
Talking Points
Internal Distribution Only, Confidential
From: Dimitri Soudas, PMO
Re: Long form census, decision to make voluntary

Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed country, I have one
final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!

Why would a Wookiee, an eight-foot tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of two-foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense!

But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with the long form census? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with the long form census! It does not make sense!

Look at me. I'm the director of communications for the Prime Minister of Canada defending a major policy decision, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense!

And so you have to remember, when you're in that voting booth deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed country, it does not make sense!

If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must support scrapping the mandatory long form census!

The defense rests.

***

You know the government is desperate when they resort to the Chewbacca Defence...

UPDATE: Liberal release demolishes some of the actual, but only slightly less silly, Conservative talking points.

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9 comments:

CanadianSense said...

How did you get a picture of CK?

Why is this a significant issue, the coalition parties outnumber the CPC and can make this a confidence motion.

Heck you even have several conservatives agree to keep the long form.

I expect this to be a significant vote winner for the Liberals and the groups that benefit from this data.

Mark Francis said...

Confidence motions over the census? And when we get another conservative minority that will mean what, exactly? One wonders exactly what that means.

"groups that benefit from this data."

That would be every last Canadian.

CanadianSense said...

The opposition can cite anything they want to stop supporting this minority. It has been nearly two years: Census, Jets, wrong direction, those liberal talking points on the bus repeated ad nauseum.

The refusal a National Daycare, impose a Cap and Trade and Carbon Tax etc.

Niles said...

That's an official Liberal release? Please tell me that's an official Liberal release when it includes geek cred like...

"This would skew the numbers even further away from the facts – which is something only a Sith Lord would do, not an honourable Jedi knight."

I could stand seeing a political party waxing part dry sardonicism, part Oi Vey.

Gayle said...

Back to his old tricks again.

Here is the deal CS. Making the long form census voluntary is bad for the country. Only a bad government would do this, and then insist on forcing an election over it.

Why is it Canadians cannot expect to have good government? Why is it people like you, when backed into a corner because there is no reasonable argument to support your defence of Harper, need to lash out and say "if you think it is such a good idea, then make me!"

I know the answer - because you hate it when there is valid criticism about Harper, and you honestly believe the way to prevent such criticism is to threaten an election.

So nice to know that like Harper, you have your party's interests at heart - not your country's.

Jeff Jedras said...

Niles, the link is indeed an official Liberal release.

CanadianSense said...

Apologist, what does your post have to do with anything, nothing!

Accountability?

The recorded votes show in Parliament about 30 Liberal MPs skip votes, supply bills since their threat to democracy facebook games. The Liberal Senators, seven did not bother to show up last week?

How is your math? Here is a link. Look to the Liberals propping up the CPC government.

http://openparliament.ca/

RuralSandi said...

CanadianSense - you sure need new material. Your arguments are so yesterday and so stale.

CS - what's Harper trying to run away from, why is he hiding?

Terence said...

rural sandi, CS is all over the blogosphere with his continued nonsense. His own party is embarrased by him.

he is a one trick pony always using obscure or meaningless or diversionary stats, just like Clement is doing to attack hism opponents.

harper is polling like a madman right now to look for an escape from this serious lack of judgement and ideological rant.

I say "go chewbacca"