Tuesday, June 08, 2010

The G20 boondoggle files: I shop at Crappy Tire and save Tony Clement $206,700

The Sun’s Greg Weston, who brought us news of the rapidly fluctuating in price Fake Lake ($2 million, $57,000, $500,000 but a bargain at any price) brings us news of more foolish Conservative over-spending and boondogglery:

For instance, taxpayers are shelling out $207,000 for 15 of what have to be the world's most expensive solar lights to illuminate the pathways at Deerhurst Resort, where the eight leaders are staying for one night.

While it is hard to believe this five-star resort had no path lights of its own, the federal contract assures us "this signature environmental project will contribute to the overall greening of the G8 summit."

And when the leaders have left the next day, the contractors have to dismantle the six-metre lights, and reinstall them somewhere in the nearby town of Huntsville.

Yes, that’s right; we’re paying $207,000 for solar lights to guide the way of the world leaders for one night. I know Stephen Harper’s Conservatives (pretend to) love Tim Horton’s but they don’t seem to share the same love for another Canadian institution: Canadian Tire.

Because as anyone who watches Canadian TV knows (Harper prefers American news), because they’ve seen all the incessant commercials, Noma Moon Rays will get the job done at a fraction of the price.

While the Nomas are good, since price is clearly no consideration here I’ll recommend the top of the line option from Westinghouse. A six-pack of high-out LED pagoda lights is just $99 at Canadian Tire.

Landslide Tony Clement needs 15 lights for Huntsville, so we’ll pick-up three of the six packs, which will run us $300 plus tax (hey, at least they beat they HST increase). That will leave us three lights to illuminate the shiny-new taxpayer-funded G8 toilet, about 20 kilometers down the road.

So that’s a grand-total savings for the government of $206,700. Why, that’s almost enough to may for one minute of G8/G20 security.

And did I mention you’ll also get Canadian Tire money?

You’re welcome, Tony.

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1 comment:

skdadl said...

Not only the lights, Jeff. Have you checked out the "water features" that Canadian Tire sells? Starting at $16.99 (ok, maybe that'a a little modest for the G8) and moving up to a pretty snazzy group thingy for under a thousand.